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Saturday Morning Hangover Blues: Absurdity Agog

Meanwhile, if registers were to be marked for attendance to church, those who need help will be leading. And why not? They are the ones who can afford to go to church from Monday to Monday.

When Joseph Hill aka Culture released his song where he advised the rich in society to be generous, little did we know that it’ll play out in this Republic of our death years after.

It’ll be fair to say that the kind of gun point armed robbery that is occurring in the Republic is relatively new; let’s just say it emerged two or three decades ago.

It started with bullion vans on highways, then it shifted to market women with load’s of foodstuff from the hinterlands to the cities on the highways and to petrol filling stations, now, it’s on the churches.

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Bank branches could do some small CSR in the communities in which they are, and not the bigger ones that the head office do to benefit just some selected people.

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For the market women, their CSR is in funeral, weddings and outdooring cloths and clothes plus festivals, when people in their immediate community need help.

Why can’t a local filling station organize some soup kitchen from time to time in the communities they operate in as their way of giving back?

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As for the churches, the main concern is collecting collections, tithes, organising harvest and there are people in the congregation who need just a few cedis to start something but lailai.
Meanwhile, if registers were to be marked for attendance to church, those who need help will be leading. And why not? They are the ones who can afford to go to church from Monday to Monday.

Home robberies are general, except the ones that have murder and torture on the minds of the robbers.
But have we ever heard of a rich capo who contributes in their communities being robbed. It’s only the chisel ones. Abeg ooo…
let’s leave it here.
But there are some robberies without guns. You know that. Abi? Lemme give one example, then you also add.
Like the Honable Sisssy’s case. Shhh… the matter is still before the Wiggy Black Robbed learned people.
Bottom line, share your riches with the poor before they start sharing them with you.
This is common sense not absurdity.

Ibi Ghana we dey!

Isn’t it about time we do away with the Wawa, Sapele, Odum or Nyame dua boards from state institutions? These are just a big drain on the Republic’s kitty. What kuraa dem dey do? Except for the perks and the so called sitting allowances?
Offer guidance you say? What guidance were the boards of the four hotels being put up for sale in a dongomi style plus about twelve board members of SSNIT had to offer than to give in to a two member board of a company wanting to buy these hotels? This one is absurd!

Ibi Ghana we dey!!

Another confusion that borders on absurdity is the recent rush to lay legislative instruments before the People’s House without consulting stakeholders to build a consensus.

One of such is the Free SHS bill. The Triumphant Patriotic Elephants are rushing to push this policy into law without consulting with the relevant stakeholders in the field.

Interestingly, Walewale Adam Smith who is leading them to break the eight says he would scrap it if he assumes the driver’s seat. And this keeps Rasta scratching his head.

Ibi Ghana we dey!!!

This definitely is not an absurdity but more of a dog bite master. This is about the Chief of Wiggy Red Robbed Supremos of the Republic recommending some Wiggy Black Robbed learned people to join the Reds. Which some learned citizens are saying it’s unconstitutional.

In relation to that, we hear the Council of the Elders in the fraternity have rejected some nominated ones coming from My President. Dog bite master!

Besides, the judicial service has dragged My President, the Republic’s topmost law man; Koo Dame, to the feet of the Wiggy Black Robbed learned people concerning the destruction of their bungalows on their own land and somehow some parts have been sold to some developers. This na dog bite master proper!!!!

Ibi Ghana we dey!!!

Rumours making rounds that Dr. Letter Tinting Chief of the Republic’s Men in Black has been booted out by My President should be carefully watched.
And the absurdity here is, the appointing authority has not commented on the matter but people outside the corridors of the appointing authority are issuing communiques to dispel the rumours. What can the Men in Black and the Umbrella Commune do when My President decides to actually give him the boot?

Ibi Ghana we dey!!!

The countries we go to beg for money like the USA has nine Wiggy Supremos serving a population of about 333.3 million. And this Republic of our death has fifteen Wiggy Red Robbed Supremos serving 33.48 million citizens and there are plans plans to add more. Absolutely absurd!!!

Don’t forget to be alert because interesting and absurd comments and promises will be coming from campaign platforms, now that there’s a chosen and confirmed mate to be running behind the driver and calling for passengers. Let’s wait.

Ibi Ghana we dey!!!

Have a good hangover morning and a quiet weekend of sifting through the sensible and absurd happenings in the Republic of our death. Cheers!!!

Kwame Rasta

Comments, corrections and general views are welcome at [email protected]

The views expressed in this article are solely the views of the writer and are purely satirical.

The Accra Times assumes no responsibility or liability for any errors or omissions in the content of this post. The information contained in this story is provided on an “as is” basis with no guarantees of completeness, accuracy, usefulness or timeliness.

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